Hospital for Hire

The National Health Service is having problems, and the Goodies are disgusted with the poor services. In a frustrated response to their criticisms, the National Health Service suggests to them that they study medicine and become doctors themselves in order to improve things. As a result, the Goodies become doctors. They pass all the tests — including beer drinking and nurse chasing.

Later, Graeme develops a special tonic and the Goodies sell it at a medicine show. They also set up their own eccentric outdoor hospital, performing X-rays (one scene shows Graeme being frightened and running away at the sight of a skeleton emerging from behind the X-ray machine) and operations, as well as setting bones and delivering babies.

The Goodies become obsessed with curing people, and collect patients from all over, including a patient from the back of an ambulance. Soon, all of Britain is cured by Graeme's tonic. Even a mummy, in a museum, is brought back to life by Graeme's tonic.

When the Goodies later become ill, they discover that curing the nation from sickness has unexpected disadvantages.

• The Complete Goodies — Robert Ross, B T Batsford, London, 2000
• The Goodies Rule OK — Robert Ross, Carlton Books Ltd, Sydney, 2006
• From Fringe to Flying Circus — Celebrating a Unique Generation of Comedy 1960-1980 — Roger Wilmut, Eyre Methuen Ltd, 1980
• The Goodies Episode Summaries — Brett Allender
• The Goodies — Fact File — Matthew K. Sharp

• "Hospital for Hire" at IMDb